My Resolve is strong: What I’m endeavoring for 2011 – Christina Long

I resolve to end my vicarious 2 year affair with Wolf Blitzer’s perfectly manicured beard and exquisitely sprayed silver mane. He is my “Situation” if you know what I mean!

I resolve to stop eating cookies to self-medicate my inefficiencies and intermittent low self-esteem.

I resolve to stop fantasizing about throwing Kim Kardashian by the inside of her meaty leg for creating reckless and useless media content.  Oh and offering a credit card to unassuming young girls (glib and easily led) who then get stuck with fees higher than the value of the card!  I’d send her hurling through the air only to laugh heartily as she collects herself and begins to chase me….Part of the reason I’ll willingly give up my Kardashian hate is I don’t want to be sued in a public forum and thus splashed upon the various pages which I detest. So Full circle, yes, I’ll cease and desist. 

I resolve to be more interesting in real life!

I promise to stop drawing beards on babies on the magazines at the Haircutters salon down the block from my house.

I resolve to break up with my wordpress ‘stats addiction’ comon’ how close could me and 65 visitors on my biggest day be? (December 9th 2010 by the way)….

I resolve to fart when I need to.  Been holding them in for 45 years.  Is that just the cruel and unusual cost of being a woman? No more! I’ll be contributing soon and often.

I resolve to eat desserts when I feel like it (except chocolate chip cookies- see  #2 – they are evil) but still paying no mind to whom I have to impress or forgo eating around.

I resolve to speak up to service people who don’t make eye contact with me, the paying customer.  That’s the least we should get right? Oh, and I’ll have figured out some pointed ways of telling them that they’re slacking.

I resolve to exercise more.  I’m a poor example of a person with Tarahumara ancestry, since I never run anymore.  Recently, playing tennis with one of my sons and my husband, I let anything near the ‘alley” just go past me.  Flippant and unapologetic if I couldn’t get to it 3 steps.  “I don’t run anymore” I told them.  “it’s done.”  (under my breath I apologized to my ancestors whom outran deer in thin shards of leather laced up their legs to secure a meal in the high rocky elevations of Mexico’s Copper Canyon.  Look at me.  I’m wasing my DNA.  I used to run 7 miles every two weeks. Not impressive, but something.  Now?  See #2.

I resolve to use my ‘Couch to 5K ap. !! Will I get my mojo back?  Time and resolve with tell.

I resolve to answer long emails on the day they arrive, instead of parlaying the efforts that it might take to read…, – saving them as new for three days on average.  I read novels, but I can’t get through an email that someone obviously cared enough about to take the time to structure?  Paginate and practically bind? COMON!!  I’ll be more timely and appreciative.

Oh! And about those emails, I promise not to reply to them with just one or two words  “Cool.”  Or “Will do” …or the sometimes used, “Got it”  promise.  It will not happen again.

I resolve not to wish Anderson Cooper wasn’t gay.  It’s not getting me anywhere.

"The Coops" as I would call him, if...we were know...

I also wish to stop lamenting the day Russell Brand met Katy Perry.

I resolve to keep learning to play guitar but this time make sure my teacher is less than 80 years old because the other one had a bit of Alzheimer’s forgetting we were meeting for class and also blathering on and on about Charo.  Whom I feel like I know now.  I was so educated in the appreciation of the ‘hootchie Kootchie queen” that I actually toyed around with getting tickets to the washed up star’s performance at Cerritos college.  Thankfully my concerned husband stopped me.

Those are my resolutions.  I may update you during the year on how it’s going.  A fart story here or a story of ruthless consumer retaliation there.  It might be a story of extreme iron pumping in preparation for actually making it to the alley side of the court during a rousing game of tennis with my 11 year old.  I don’t plan on letting any ‘aces’ get by me this year.

In any case it will be enlightening.  Happy New Year.

Christina Long

Blographer / and other stuff.

6 thoughts on “My Resolve is strong: What I’m endeavoring for 2011 – Christina Long

    • Ooh…extremely late 2 reply 2 U, but Thx for the vote of confidence. Last week I OWNED my 11 year old in Tennis! Parenting 101 Teaching skill through humiliation. Ugh, a parent’s job is never done.

      • Tennis is the best. Play with the wife couple times a week. Great exercise..especially when she runs me around the court. Cool he’s playing! Most kids have never played. Hope Steve is better?! Hopefully you’re keeping up with your resolutions above?? Especially the no-cookies & farting. Take care.

      • YES! Letting the gas go when I want! what FREEDOM from the chains of perceived femininity! Of course culture still gets the best of me : ( I refrain in most company, but much better! Ah yes…the cookies. I have only been the victim of clouded thinking once since my post… and that was two weeks ago. I indulged in two! they were RATHER LARGE warm doughy white chocolate chip behemoths. I could NOT RESIST! BUT!!! I am back on the horse, having suffered one week of guilt after that, and more salads than normal for me in order to ‘balance’ my indiscretion.

        As for tennis, my eleven year old is getting better, but HA! i can still beat him! Children have that tendency to grow up and become physically stronger than their parents, but I’m trying to stave that off. My demise will come soon enough, so why let them gain ground? As for Steve, it’s all a miracle. Modern medicine is amazing. Big insurance companies are laughing all the way to the bank, but I think for now I will not think about that because I am too happy he’ll be around for alot longer now. As you know, Steve had mitral valve repair with the Da Vinci robot and a super star status cardio thoracic surgeon named Alfredo Trento. So, I have to think twice about socialized medicine. Don’t think our outcome would’ve been this way! He’s Healing well! And as for who I will let win on the court, I will give Steve a pass when he’s well, but as for my boys…. they are NOT off the hook!!!

        Thx 4 your post Tony! Hope you and yours are doing well!

    • Thanx 4 taking a peek at it 🙂 Besides the usual ‘new goals we set for ourselves” in aspiration, and “cast offs” we would do well to leave behind … It’s the little self realizations that can make a big difference. The losing weight for the new year? yah, I need to do that…the resolve to carve out more ‘me time’ yah..that’s on the list too…but some of these little quirky obsessions…and small social adjustments, they get no attention usually. I say..let’s look at the small stuff too. Should I stop sneering when a waiter approaches to read me the entire menu of specials at a restaurant? When my stomach is growling and I just want to blurt out my choice? Maybe so. Would it make a difference in my life? maybe…How about his? definitely yes. I think we need to give attention to the ‘baby steps’ no matter how esoteric.

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